War is Peace

Yeah, sorry to be so late with this post. It's been a weird week. Not to mention a week so infuriating that I have come dangerously close to suffering a ragerysm (rage-induced aneurysm). But anyway forward into the breach fellow snarkers.

So we cut back to Vicki and co. They've been watching the entire gathering on TV and they are shocked! Not by the GC brutally taking care of a threat by opening fire on a stadium full of people, but by Nicky Cardamom using foul language! Violence is okay, but heaven forbid the incarnation of Satan use bad language. That might have scarred a few children for life assuming there are even still children in this world.

There's a brief interlude where Vicki explains to Melinda about the whole Jesus as the sacrificial lamb bit, of course ignoring the whole question as to why Zod couldn't change a rule that he himself wrote. Thankfully though we don't have to linger long on this when we can read about the YTF watching Nicky's response to the speech.

Anyway so Nicky decides to talk about what happened and of course, the YTF snicker and make sarcastic remarks the entire time, ignoring the unpleasant fact that Nicky is considerable more sympathetic.

Nicky talks about how all the other religions have managed to live in peace except for RTCianity. Then he describes RTCianity as a sect with its roots in historical Christianity and I roll my eyes and say, "Yeah, if by historical you mean dating back to the late nineteenth or early twentieth century. If by historical you mean say first century Christianity, you wanna be the one to tell Ellanjay or should I?"

Nicky also says the usual BS about how this is a perversion of centuries of Christian thinking and talks about how God is a god of love aka that typical hippie bullshit that leads to people assuming hippie bullshit like that Jesus ever said anything about the peacemakers being blessed by God. We don't go for that crap in the good ol' US of A.

Anyway Nicky Rocky says he encouraged this public gathering of people opposed to him and even televised it because he wanted Token Jew and his followers to join him. He says he would not have forced Token Jew to join him and I suppose we're supposed to roll our eyes over Nicky's duplicity, but would Token Jew really be any different if he was in Nicky's position of power? Would he really let those who disagreed with his views of God yet were otherwise peaceful live and practice their faith in peace and not persecute them in any way? Again as said before and will be repeated many times as necessary, Ellanjay and his followers don't object to a One-World Theocracy so long as the right person with the right beliefs is running it.

Out of curiosity, who wants to tell Ellanjay that while Spain and other Christian nations were torturing and persecuting the Jews, those Islamo-Commie-Nazis that made up the Ottoman Empire allowed freedom of religion?

I say this because even Nicky Denali points out that the Gruesome Twosome have killed more people who disagreed with them than Nicky. But even though he believes that Token Jew and the Gruesome Twosome along with their followers tried to kill him, he's still going to very eeevilly grant them permission to continue their gathering, complete with cameras and the full protection of GC security though only for 48 hours.

:headwall:

This is...I don't even need to get into how incredibly stupid this is, do I? I mean even that dude who ruled Turkmenistan and named a bunch of months after himself is smarter than Nicky. Preschoolers with their arms and legs tied together and armed with their safety scissors are scarier than Nicky. Wet cardboard painted hot pink and lime green presents more of an obstacle to the RTCs than Nicky.

Newsflash to aspiring writers everywhere: you don't create suspense by making your villain so stupid your average newborn could outsmart them.

I decided to do another chapter unlike next week in which I only did one. So the gang in Israel end up in the seamy side of town which contains such evils as bars, fortune-telling shops, tattoo parlors, and strip clubs all of which makes me go :yawn: :snore: Let me know when they mention something that isn't found in your average everyday reasonably sized city. It's like those recordings which claim to be of people in hell but really sound no worse than what you'd hear in a busy bar on a Friday night. Anyway they go to see the Gruesome Twosome rant like mental patients and said prophets torch some GC soldiers.

Not much to say except that we have yet another reiteration on how if you do one bad thing Zod hates you unless you kowtow and promise never to make him so mad again. So yeah, I know you've probably guessed it by now but according to God's prophets, Gandhi is in Hell and will be there for all eternity for the crime of being a Hindu and creating one of the largest democracies on earth without firing a single shot, whereas Fred Phelps will get a one-way ticket to Heaven when he dies because he after all, has said the words which makes him a Christian.

The chapter ends with Judd talking to a GC guard, who is a lot more shaken by all the shit that's gone down despite no doubt being an eeevil heathen. Judd tries the typical God-loves-you and all this horrific suffering is him trying to get your attention spiel, but the GC points out that those comrades of his who confronted the prophets wouldn't be dead if it weren't for Zod. I'm going to name this dude Cornelius (why? Read the chapter of Acts after Peter receives the okay to eat shellfish) and add him to my list of favorite characters along with the Power Couple of Awesomenesss that is Hasina and Taylor.