Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Zod: the Sadistic Sims Player

Sorry sorry again for the late post. I went into hibernation on Sunday. As to why I didn't post Monday, the only excuse is general laziness. Besides given how little is currently going on in these books were you really quivering with anticipation for my snark?

Well turns out rumours of Taylor Graham's death were completely exaggeratted. Turns out Hank'n'Judy, aka the uncaring sociopaths who cheerfully serve Zod even though Zod cheerfully murdered their son in the Wrath of the Lamb quake,saved him. They tried to convert him but given that there's no Super Special Awesome Secret Mark on his forehead, it apparently didn't take. Hank'n'Judy are dead though, murdered at the hands of the Nicky's Gestapo.

Lionel ties to convert Taylor but Taylor has the audacity to be concerned about the safety of his brother, Conrad, in the arms of the GC. So together he and the YTF start trying to plan how to get him out.

Anyway it's not looking good for the YTF. The GC are planning to rig up the rendezvous with snipers and make an example out of them, which is the first smart thing they've done so far. But the YTF are mustering forces of their own. Apparently Pete converted his fellow bikers to Anti-Anti-Christianity so they have them as support now. Again, this would all be suspenseful if: a) I gave a shit or b)I didn't know this series was forty books in length thus preventing a "rocks fall, everyone dies" kind of ending.

Next chapter, Conrad slips Mr. Stein the key to his cuffs and tells him to unlock them but keep them on as they head to meet up with the YTF.

Okay so the big rendezvous is going down. The GC wants them to turn themselves in but Judd's like "I'm not coming unless you send out Darrion and Mr. Stein." Meanwhile the snipers are in position and have itchy trigger fingers. But Conrad, who's currently carrying the YTF's collective braincells, ambushes the GC commander, without getting picked off by his fellow Morale Monitors or by snipers or the commander himself, and points a gun at him, causing the snipers to back down. But then, Taylor, currently being the resident badass, shows up in a helicopter and starts firing frigging missles at the GC. Not a bad idea, but y'know missles have the annoying habit of exploding and creating shrapnel that can injure the innocent comrades you're trying to save.

Anyway, the YTF get in the copter just in time for Zod to try to kill us all with flaming hailstones that turn into blood when they hit the earth. From the perspective of Judd, he remarks that it's like a video game, which says more than the writers intended. For from their perspective, God or Zod is basically a Sadistic Sims Player. Like said Sadistic Sims Player (SSP), Zod is all-powerful and can make your life hell for shits and giggles and no matter how Ellanjay try to rationalize it, that's basically his MO in the series.

Anyway, for once this is a two-chapter snark. I once again apologize for the lateness of this post and hope y'all enjoy it.

5 comments:

Firedrake said...

I must admit, I'm not hitting "refresh" and wondering where you've got to - I just see your posts when the RSS aggregator pulls them in.

I can't help but note that the YTF here have done a whole heap more in terms of actually fighting against the Antichrist and the NWO than we ever hear about in the "main" books. Yes, I know we've got further along, but the contrast is still pretty dramatic.

Hmm, I dare say L&J would call a Mk.66 Hydra a "missile", and they're a pretty good weapon for chewing up soft ground targets. But they're not exactly precision weapons.

I think you may be able to take the Sims analogy further - at least when I've been playing, I've sometimes taken a liking to a Sim because he's done something cute or clever...

Apocalypse Review said...

@Firedrake: I check manually m'self :)

It's interesting how L&J have used these books to kind of fill in the gaps left by the Left Behind main books, in addition to trying to push the idea of PMD Christianity to a teenage audience.

Re: Sims.

I'm thinking of SimCity, where you can actually *cause* disasters if you are so inclined (Me, I turn disasters off :P ).

hidden_urchin said...

Here's Zod's campaign ad courtesy of College Humor (this one is safe for work):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AVl8vfev4L8

Apocalypse Review said...

Hmm! I also notice that Vicki seems to have gone along with the Judd-inspired "we'll turn ourselves in" scheme. Has Stepfordization commenced already? O_O

Rhoadan said...

@apocalypsereview: You know why there's user controlled disasters in the Simcity games, don't you? During playtesting of the original game, they discovered that players would build their cities to a certain point, and then start bulldozing it. Clearly, there was a need to provide a feature that caused large scale death and destruction. And the user controlled disasters were born.