Branding Jesus

Happy Easter and how is everybody! I got in the Easter spirit by watching The Last Temptation of Christ. Great movie, definitely a nice palate cleanser after having to deal with Ellanjay's view of God. Consider Temptation to be the movie, Mel Gibson's Passion of the Christ wishes it could be: a wrenching, passionate look into the life and times of our Lord. The trouble with so many movie portrayals of Jesus is that he comes across as distinctly unpassionate, reciting platitudes and parables with all the fervor of a wet piece of cardboard. This is a mistake: regardless of what you belief about Jesus Christ, surely he must have been more charismatic to make men leave their homes and families to follow him. But in Temptation, we get a sweating, striving, passionate Jesus that makes the whole film worth watching, even if Willem DaFoe is a little too Aryan to properly portray Jesus. Anyway, long story short, watch The Last Temptation of Christ; don't read Ellanjay's books.

But I vowed to snark as long as people will read my snarks, so here goes.

Anyway, Judd is told to cut out of his speech:

"Mentions of God. About the disappearances being a 'wake-up call.'"

Frankly I agree with them and not just because I hate Judd. A tragedy should not be used as an excuse for an altar call. It is a ghoulish and evil practice and should be stopped. We would be offended if a competing airline used the 9/11 disaster to advertise their services; why should we use Jesus the same way?

Apparently the graduation services are going to be airred live on CNN and if you can't point out all the things unrealistic/wrong with that scenario...Well I don't need to fill in the blanks, now do I? Anyway, even Leon Fortunato (have fun taking apart that name) is going to be there which causes the valedictorian to faint leaving Judd to the rescue!

Okay, I do believe in giving credit where credit is due so here we go: I liked the first part of Judd's speech where he asks for a moment of silence for those lost to the disappearances. This is the only instance of anyone mourning in the Left Behind universe. I cite as example, exhibit A: Rayford who forgot all about his wife once he was saved.

Now that I've given credit where credit was due, let me say something shocking: the speech quickly goes downhill after Judd confesses to having written the Underground. Afterwards, it turns into your standard altar call which is wrong for reasons I've already mentioned.

Next chapter, we find out the consequences of said speech: Judd is expelled, given no school credit, is banned from every college, and has to sign a document saying that he won't make disloyal statements against the NWO.

Remember how in a previous chapter one of the YTF, Mark, had expressed an interest in joining a militia? Well that plot thread is abruptly picked up.

"Tomorrow night we're simulating an attack," Mark said. "I can't say much, but the militia is big. I think God is going to use it to overthrow Carpathia."
"That doesn't square with scripture," Judd said.
"What are we supposed to do, roll over and play dead?" Mark said.

That's a good question, Mark, because right now that is the TF's plan. Well actually, the plan is to hide in a hole and did I mention it is a very selective hole? Bruce stalwartly refuses to let the other members of his congregation know who the anti-Christ is because he deems them worthy of immense suffering. So in a way, I like Mark though the idea of a child becoming a soldier sickens me: at least he's doing something.

Judd is still trying to talk Mark out of it, though.

"But Carpathia has gathered all the nuclear weapons," Judd said. "What chance could you possibly have? It's like a slingshot against a bazooka."

Apparently Judd hasn't heard of guerilla warfare. Sure the militia would die if they faced the enemy directly but in guerilla warfare, that seldom happens. The militia may be small but they can raid Nicky Karakoram's stores of supplies and weapons and generally make pests of themselves. After all, we had nukes and all kinds of superior weapons and we still lost Vietnam. It's very hard to take out guerilla fighters.

Well anyway, Mark, Judd, and Vicki go to the training exercise, but while they're there, the NWO goons show up. But it turns out that the militia had expected them to show up; in fact, they had planned this training exercise as an excuse to draw them out, while the rest of the militia attacks. Needless to say, faced with actual action, the YTF beat a brave retreat and we don't find out how the attack goes. But right now, I like the militia because they're doing a hell of a lot more than the TF hiding in their hidey-hole.